LBC: Balancing your Every Day Life With Your Frills

"Ship's Log, Supplemental Entry:

If I lived in a vacuum, I might coord a little differently.

But I live in the real world, with real people, so sometimes I need to... compromise.

[I know, I know.  It's the worst.]

There are five major areas of my life that heavily influence my participation in lolita, from how I wear it, to how frequently I wear it, and also where I keep it.  Work, Public, Home, Social, and Health.

Work

While we do not have a dress code, I am expected to maintain a certain level of professionalism in my appearance at work.  I also don't want to be a huge distraction or too different from my usual work look.  These are the guidelines I follow when I coordinate for the office:

- Keep coordinates crisp, classy, and very simple - no OTT, asymmetry, tons of accessories, etc.
- Stick to the same color palette as your work wardrobe - mine is monochrome, neutrals, bordeaux, and a splash of mint and rose.
- Arms/legs should be covered (at minimum, sheer tights/socks and 3/4 sleeve blouse).
- Footwear should be mature (pointed toe and slender heel over rounded toe and chunky heel).

Here's an example of something cute, but not too cutesy, for work.

Public

The folks at work "get" me, but I dislike being stopped and questioned by the public when I need to leave the safety of our big secure building, so I dress to prevent as much of it as possible.  These are the tips that help me manage that:

- Always bring/wear nondescript outerwear (solid color, not too flashy, hides outfit).
- Secret entrance and private room (go full V.I.P. princess and just not let the public see you).
- Practice looking confident, friendly, in charge, and aloof.  For some people, this is easier with a friend at your side.

Good friends and a big black coat!  My friends in pink have thicker skin than me, ha!

Home

I share my home with two dogs and a man, and only my office is 100% mine to rule.  This is how I divvy up my things and decor around the house so that everyone is happy:

- We compromise on decor of living/common areas (artsy living room, simple kitchen, woodsy bedroom).
- My office is my personal space to go all out.  It has lace curtains on everything.  This pleases me.  And keeps me from putting lace in the kitchen.
- Delicate lolita stuff stays in a separate wardrobe in the office, the dogs can slobber on everything else.

No dogs allowed.  Or boyfriends, for that matter.

Social

 Most of my friends are not lolita, so I like to ride the line between "one of these things is not like the others" and actually meshing with their styles so we look like a cohesive clique.  These are some of the things I/we do that help make the "token lolita" thing work:

- My close friends and I often check ahead to see what the others will be wearing so we can sync up our looks a little bit.
- I try to coord the same level of formal/casualness that my normie friends and acquaintances do in their own respective styles (often casual or lolita a la mode).
- Attend "cute-and-femme-but-not-necessarily-lolita-activities" where everyone feels at home (brunch, getting ice cream together, or getting a manicure).

Non-lolita coordinate for grabbing a casual bite with non-lolita friends.
Sometimes we all wear skirts, or flowers, or some theme that ties us together, despite different styles.

Health

I need to carefully consider my outfit choice in terms of health and comfort, and take breaks from certain restrictive items.

- Don't wear the big heavy stuff too frequently (a three day convention needs a light, casual, wigless outfit or two in the mix somewhere, for example)!
- No costume jewelry on the skin (over fabric, or non metal/precious metal jewelry only).
- If I'm going to be walking, the coord needs to start with comfortable shoes if nothing else, which usually means slightly more normie/classic footwear over kawaii stuff (though, weirdly, I find RHS pretty comfy).

Flat shoes, layers, and a water bottle.  Heck yes.

I'm sure there are other smaller things that influence when, where, and how I participate in the fashion, like other J-fash or western fashions I want to try, or how much I want to buy vs how much I earn and the need to be financially responsible, hahaha!  But those are all the big ones that come to mind.  What things in your life do you need to balance with lolita: are you a painter in a messy studio, or do you have a strict dress code?

Until next time!  Bear signing off!"

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Other blogs who covered this Lolita Blog Carnival topic:

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